The Art of Open Sensuality Page #17

How to Meet People

On to a more pleasant topic: When we first ventured into this, we were more active, but we have not patronized the Ace of Hearts (a local swingers club) more than once in 2002, as the club seems to be dieing off. We tried out New Horizons just North of Seattle in October and again in January, and would say that it is well worth the drive and extra $. It is a fun and dynamic place to be with your mate, and have a great time playing erotically, just the two of you in a semi-public place. As long as you are not expecting Swingers to look like hot ass strippers, there is some great eye candy that is not to be seen at any other places in the NW. They are just real people like you; , young, old, slim, and fat, attractive or not. There is a wide range. I would not say that you can stereo-type Swingers.

If you are not into casual sexual encounters with relative strangers, it is not a good place to be on a first date with another couple, as the energy there is a little too charged and pressured to do something more than just talk. A Swingers Club is not the kind of place you want to take a nice couple that you have grown to like. You would be much happier getting a nice clean motel room for that kind of money, that is if you are not able to invite them home with you, because of your children or neighbors. Some times you are able to go to their place, which is likely to be much nicer than a motel room. We have special guests over on some of our weekends the kids are with the Ex, but that is for people we have gotten to know.

We are not into swapping for intercourse (as you may have gathered here), but you will find that this is more the rarity. Many couples may appear to be on the same track as you, that is to take things slow and careful. But they are often looking for much more, and as soon as possible, only careful not to scare you off that is. The moment they get too pushy, they know they have lost. Stand your ground and be assertive about what you are wanting from a relationship with them. Do not let them be your teachers in this lifestyle, as they are not trained professionals, and do not know what is best for the two of you. If your marriage happens to break up because of your interaction with them, it is little to no skin off their back.

On-line connections are certainly a safer way to hook up with couples open to this alternative lifestyle. It will take thousands of hours of effort to make worthwhile connections with good couples to be intimate with. There are many different avenues to an on-line search: Lifestyle Lounge, Softswing.com, Adult Friends Finder, Sexy Ads, Bi-finders, etc. . Many web sites will want to pick your pocket though. Lifestyle Lounge, seems to have the best set up that we have seen, and no, we do not get kickbacks for referring you to these web sites. Yahoo does seem to have a nice set-up that allows you to access target groups for free (like our Group), but you will be inundated by ads galore. Simply speaking, you get what you pay for. MSN also has a system, but it is not so well implemented, and you still have the ads.

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